Forgiveness isn’t easy

I was talking with a guy from my small group about forgiveness.  I was looking for something different to share with him on the topic and came across something from CS Lewis. Lewis talks about forgiveness in his book Reflections of the Psalms.

Lewis shares “We need to forgive our brothers seventy times seven not only for 490 offenses but for one offense.

His interpretation of these verses hits to the heart of an issue so many of us face. Forgiveness isn’t a one and done decision.  There are times we have to forgive the same offense over and over again. 

It isn’t that someone is doing the same thing over and over. It is the fact that a single offense continues to rise up and the resentment is re kindled. We have to actively choose to forgive even if it is the same offense over and over.  The fact that the emotions are still there does not mean we haven’t or can’t forgive. It simply means the wound is still open and the resentment and hurt continue to affect us.

There is no such thing as “forgive and forget.”  Forgiveness doesn’t diminish the hurt of the offense. It  does not demand reconciliation or automatically restore access.  

It is a process of healing and it can take time. Many times there are scars that will remain and those scars retell their story every time they are seen. Every time we hear their story, the emotions return.

Choosing forgiveness again and again is the only way those scars will heal and eventually fade away to a shadow of what they once were. 

We must choose to surrender those offenses to God. He will help us to offer the same forgiveness He has given to us.